Yesterday I turned 23. I know, I know, it’s young, very young. As I was engulfed in love and celebration, the feeling began to set in, the feeling that I wasn’t living up to the expectations I had created for myself, that I wasn’t on the schedule I’d created. I found myself in a toddler like state, throwing a fit, creating issues and erupting in selfishness and anger towards the most love filled aspects of my life.
So, why did this all happen? ….. Expectations, yep.
I wasn’t living in the present. I was completely obsessed with the future, which doesn’t leave space to appreciate the present. When I stop and look at the present with gratitude I think, ” Holy shit, It is all so so good”
To be always living in the moment and appreciating the present is hard, very very hard. We are constantly challenged; needing to control future experiences and fixate on past ones. So how do we become better at doing so? Practice. This is exactly the reason we practice, to practice being better at love, to practice being better at being here, now, and no where else.
The mind drifts, and rather than reacting we simply notice and remind ourselves to come back to the now; this is living mindfully. The practice is not just when we step on the mat for a handstand, it is always, it is infinite.
I write this primarily to remind myself of all these things, because well sometimes we get the birthday blues..
The Southern Living Latina